An Updated Commentary on Disney Princesses and Demure Wallflowers

I haven't blogged since before the holidays as I had the lovely opportunity to travel home for Christmas and to visit loved ones in Virginia for New Years. Now that I'm back in the proverbial grind (whatever that is), I thought I would usher in this new year of blogging with my CURRENT thoughts about  Disney princess fairytales. There's a nice preface for you. It is actually kind of sad that you still see evidence of my academic writing skills in the way I preface everything, even thank you cards and blog posts. Oh well.

So let's talk Disney princess fairytales, which we know are loosely based off of much darker stories by the Grimm brothers. But for the purposes of this discussion, I'll be ranting about the Disney versions. And please jump in with your own thoughts. Goodness knows, I love a good princess discussion. Let's take a look at Cinderella and Snow White and common themes in these stories.



 Both are static rather than dynamic characters, would you agree? By this I mean they appear as developed characters and while they influence actions of other characters, neither undergoes any huge period of growth during which their character is changed. The growth has undoubtedly happened, but prior to the moment when we see the story begin. So when the going gets tough, these girls simply shine. We don't see development. We don't see growth. We do see difficult circumstances and we see traits like kindness, patience and hope flog the evil that pervades their lives, and, yes, they live 'happily ever after.' Their light is pure and sweet and with it, they battle and win.

The other common theme in these stories is that the identity of Prince Charming is known, at least to the viewer. Cinderella isn't aware of his identity and for Snow White...sheesh...he shows up just in the nick of time. We see relatively little relationship development or interaction with the princes at all, really, which I also thought was interesting. Snow White meets him briefly at the beginning and then falls into his arms when he kisses her. Cinderella spends a few moments with him at a dance and then, next we see her walking down the aisle, losing her shoe again. I mean, does this strike you as disturbing?

What is also disturbing is that if you look at Ariel (in a league all her own, I must say), she's practically a stalker! (We do see some character development in her though, as she learns to respect authority). I place Ariel and Jasmine in the same category and I'm not quite sure why. I love both of these stories, and they seem to be more dynamic than the girls in the first category but not quite as dynamic as others. So I sort of lump them together, yet separately. (Again, Ariel and Jasmine fans, thoughts?)

Aurora is also in her own little world because even though she is also a static character as Snow and Cindy are, her relationship with Philip is more developed than those of the first two. They at least meet, converse and dance! Philip is also in a league of his own when it comes to the princes because in my opinion, he's the only one who actually fights for the princess and proves his love for her. He eventually kills a dragon for Pete's sake. What did Cinderella's prince do? Oh, I don't know...hmmm...sat back and let his dad plan his future for him and then sent the duke to track down his so-called love. IMPRESSIVE?! Not so much, Cindy. Not so much. At least Snow White's prince actually tracked her down himself and didn't sit back in his palace sipping cocktails while the love of his life was in danger.

ANYWAY...

Let's look at Belle, and now Rapunzel. These are the characters that we meet as flawed individuals. Perhaps I'm fixating on them because they are somewhat new to me. Oddly, I was not allowed to watch Beauty and the Beast when I was little. I'm not even sure why to tell you the truth. But I didn't grow up on it. In fact, I've only seen the movie all the way through twice. Belle is presented as different--not in the sweet, kind, lovely, demure, patient way that Snow and Cinderella are presented or in the regal way that Jasmine or Ariel are introduced. She's depicted as an odd one, and we find she has a temper later on as well. Rapunzel is afraid, timid, unable to express herself and slightly naive at the beginning of her story (which also is appealing to me because there is no Prince Charming in that story at all). These are DYNAMIC characters.

(Belle and Beast and Rapunzel and Flynn also arguable spend the most time involved in relationship development as well, spending most of their respective stories conversing, spending time together, arguing, working their way through conflict, individually and together. I just thought I would point this out).

The leading gentlemen in these stories are also dynamic with Flynn and the Beast  changing drastically by the end of each story. Both are depicted as selfish and Flynn as careless and Beast as angry. They change, evolve as the girls do.

What's my point?

When I was younger, I was drawn to your typical Snow White/Cinderella story. And while there's nothing wrong with these stories (and if these are your favorites, don't take this personally), I find myself moving away from my old favorites and finding new ones.

I like that Belle is angry and stubborn and impatient with Beast. I like that Rapunzel doesn't have the courage to go after her dreams at first. I LIKE the way that Belle screams in frustration at Beast and,  heck, I freaking LOVE the inappropriate way that Rapunzel handles conflict by hitting people over the head with frying pans!

These girls are the antithesis of Snow White and Cinderella! I like that they are depicted as imperfect, flawed, human. I like that we see the journey, the path to change. From this, we not only identify, but we learn.

I remember being awed as I watched Cinderella and Snow White as a little girl, recognizing patience and sweetness that I knew I couldn't possess in the same circumstances. I looked at them the same way I did the Proverbs 31 woman--something made of gold and crystal on a high shelf somewhere that I could stare at in wonder without ever touching. I wished I could look like that, sparkle and shine like it and be gentle and sweet, timid even, shy. I always wished I wasn't so loud, that I could be a demure wallflower.

This just in: I AM NOT A DEMURE WALLFLOWER.

I won't ever be a demure wallflower! God bless 'em, but I'm not one. And I don't think that I can be one of my own doing, or trained to be one by my parents (thank God they loved me for who I was), or at the hand of God. (Yep, I just said that. Think about it and don't overreact and if you do, send me a nasty message. Take a number). Anyway, that is not how I was created to be.

And I look back on the way I watched Disney princess films as a child, wishing I could be soft and lovely like Cinderella and wondering how I could possibly resist from pulling the stepsister's hair or kicking them or telling them to stop being so unjust, were I in her tiny, glass shoes. Snow White ran from the Queen and I used to sit and stare and wonder why she didn't just punch her out and take over the kingdom! The kingdom would have been better off! She had every right to stage a coup! (I literally used to think this as I watched the story...why did she run into the forest and hide? Or after meeting the dwarfs, why not go all Swiss Family Robinson on the queen and stand her ground?)

Now, I watch Belle and Rapunzel and I think a couple things. First, this world takes all kinds of princesses and I will always watch ladies like Cinderella and Snow White in awe. In fact, one of my dear friends who is no longer with us was pretty much the embodiment of all the best qualities of those two princesses all the time--like FOR REALS. Being around her was like experiencing magic. She literally glowed--that's how big her  heart was and how soft and gentle her spirit was. They found a brain tumor and she fought it as long as she could before losing that battle a few years ago. I loved her. I loved watching her and being around her. She touched lives in ways that I physically, literally never could.

But I touch lives, too. Not in the same way--not as gracefully or as beautifully. But I do. So do people reading this, or you can anyway. And I'm not a static character--I'm dynamic. I'm flawed and human and I don't keep those flaws hidden away as the wicked stepmother and evil queen tried to do (heh, and look what happened to them...a good lesson for people who try to hide their pain and refuse to deal with it, I might add). I am real.

So to sum up--this world takes all kinds of princesses.

I'm growing--more like Belle and Rapunzel than the lovely, graceful Cindy or Snow. I'm dynamic. I'm flawed. I'm on a journey.

 I'm also not a demure wallflower.

And for the first time ever, I realize that's ok.

And so literally as "just katie", I bid you all a goodnight and leave you with two questions:
1) what kind of character are you?
2) have you accepted your role and your journey?